My So Called Scarf

Although I stopped knitting for much of 2007, this scarf is the result of my vacation knitting. I began this last year around this time and finished it a year later. Be sure to click on the photo for a larger picture of the really beautiful stitch. It is knit with ImagiKnit Manos del Uruguay yarn that is variated in both color and thickness using a pattern for My So Called Scarf. I originally got the idea from the International Scarf Exchange which has a list of links on the right-hand side for some truely beautiful scarf patterns. I knit this straight from the pattern, but after I finished the scarf, I realized that YouTube has a helpful video for mastering this stitch. Would have been nice to have this when I started!

People have commented that the bindoff allows the scarf to flare out at the ends. With this in mind, I cast on tightly. For the bindoff, I got some of the smallest knitting needles I could find, about a size 4, and knit one row of the pattern stitch and then did a bindoff stitch. It worked perfectly and I have a nice tight bindoff.

Right now, I'm working on a very simple knit-while-you-watch-TV pattern using really thick yarn that had been sitting in my stash. As soon as I saw the pattern, I knew this was the perfect yarn to use. Soon, I'll have a thick and warm warp around the neck scarf, perfect for winter mornings. More knitting projects to come!

Acceptance Letters

After weekends of filling out college applications and follow-up phone calls, standing over my son and making dire threats about what would happen if he didn't complete his essays, and all those worries that he wouldn't get into any college ... Ryan was accepted at Frostburg State University, Western State College of Colorado, and McDaniel College (which surprised me because I didn't even think I had completed that application!!!). I have no idea which school he'll ultimately pick, but I'm so gratified that he has a choice of schools to attend. Acceptance letters mean a lot to parents.

And now FAFSA season begins.

Dare I Dream?

When I wrote the "Rebuilding" post back in November, I wasn't feeling positive about running and wanted to quit. So I started to play mind games with myself. One trick was to write a blog post that was positive to give myself positive throughts to rally around. Another strategy was based on what Jenny Hadfield wrote:

"Follow the three-week rule. Practice patience. Being a runner takes time. It takes 21 days to create a new habit. Running regularly will become a habit over time. A body that is active, will want to stay active. A body that is inactive will want to stay inactive. The first 3 weeks is the most challenging."

After reading this, I decided to wait 21 days before I quit running to get in the habit again and rebuild. If I felt like quitting, I could write that in my log -- in big bold letters if need be. Of course, if there was anything actually enjoyable about the run, I had to write that. Pretty soon, there were more entries about enjoyable moments than not.

As the result, I didn't give up and I didn't quit. It's still challenging around this time of year to go out on cold, dark, windy days and watch the steam rise from my breath in the light of my headlamp. Some days my motivation seems to be gone with the daylight. I'm truely just getting back into running and have an itty bitty teeny weeny very small recreational base from which to build. Swimming is going along well, and I'm swimming 1,000 yards to a mile. Cycling is still my weakest link and I can barely spin in lowest gear for any length of time.

Dare I dream?

Photo courtesy of Steven Glass, Colorado Runner

It's Over

We were all told that nobody knows how they did at the end of the exam, and I certainly find this to be true. I can see that I'll have fun tormenting myself about this over in the coming weeks as I remember questions and my responses and wonder if I answered them correctly. I'm not expecting to pass. 'Twas the weeks before Christmas and visions of scantron sheets with red slashes dance through my mind. My mentor for the exam suggested that if I didn't pass, I should hit the books and try again during the next exam, stating that the material would still be fresh in my mind. If I choose that option, I'll take this goal underground.

I keep a running long, and I almost wish I'd kept a studying log because I'm curious as to just how many hours I've spent studying in preparation for this exam. The one good thing is that it's over.

Farewell to 10801 in Pictures

Farewell graffiti

Outside of building

Packing crates piled high

My desk

Trees

Courtyard

Rebuilding

I haven't been running regularly at all, except for going out on the weekends with my husband. I've introduced him to my favorite trail which is a path through the woods where the leaves are turning color. I only run 2 miles now, so that means that I follow him for a mile, and then walk while he goes to the turnaround point and comes back, at which point I follow him again. I like the feeling of running and gliding along with a thick carpet of leaves beneath my feet. That's the enjoyable part.

Getting back into running regularly on the weekdays has been a huge challenge. I think I'm going about it all wrong. I finally Googled up articles on returning to running after injury, and I now believe the best way to do this is to start by walking 30 minutes with a 5 minute run, gradually increasing the length of the running portion, and then increasing the run to walk ratio, until I'm running 30 minutes. This should take about 4 weeks. I'll see how this works out.

Just to make it more challenging, my treadmill broke. This means no indoor running in the comfort of my basement, even if I'm staring at my insulation. I've been getting up in the wee predawn hours to jog outside, armed with a headlamp and dressed warmly, although the temperatures keep dropping. My biggest surprise is that I'm not the only one stirring at this hour. I see about three other cars warming up and getting ready to go to work.

Right now, swimming is the best thing that I've got going. It always makes me feel like a million, like running used to. After swimming, I'll get in the car and drive to work in bumper-to-bumper traffic, and it won't bother me. Ohmmmmmmm! I actually decided to cut back on swimming and gradually build up. I'll warm up, then swim about 800 yards working on my flip turns. Then I'll do another 500 free at a very relaxed pace, almost a cooldown, until I've been in the water for 40 minutes or so.

I'm reaching to the finish line with CAE studying. I've got one more domain to tackle and a final exam with my online course. I also need to produce notes for my study group on D10. After that, I'll begin taking practice tests and reviewing everything as I head for the finish line.

With the half marathon, I was completely unprepared for any alternate outcomes. But with the CAE exam, I've met *more* than a half dozen people who didn't pass the test the first time around--really bright people--and I'm mentally prepared for either outcome. And as I head into the final stretch, I have this feeling that 2008 is going to be redemption year -- the year that I try to accomplish what I don't accomplish in 2007.

Cleared

I was told I had knee arthritis -- until I actually had x-rays taken and they came back clean. Turns out it was simply an overuse injury. That's the good news. Not having joint problems is really a very good thing.

Doesn't change anything else though.

Inspirational Link of the Day

Triathlete leaves competitors, self-pity behind

I hope the day comes when we talk about an individual's accomplishments first and their disability second.

Another Countdown

Kyrie Eleison
Down the road that I must travel
Kyrie Eleison
Through the darkness of the night
Kyrie Eleison
Where I'm going will you follow

--Mr. Mister

I'm knocking off domain after domain as I count down the weeks until the CAE exam on Dec. 7. I'm a little burned out on studying, which is one of my latest challenges. My study group is one of the things that keeps me going. The actual group meeting is simply a review for me as I get an outline of a domain I've already studied. I also know from talking to other people that I've done far more studying than most, being the perfectionistic individual that I am. But then again, I can't imagine just getting started in studying for this test with the sheer amount of specific information that must be kept in mind.

Things are getting a little crazy. I have an IEP meeting coming up for one kid, and the other decided he wants to join the Marines. We're a passionately anti-war family and we're hoping that he doesn't just go down to the recruiter's office and enlists the day he turns 18. My other hobby is completing college applications in hopes that he actually goes to college.

My exercise life has been practically non-existent. I haven't run regularly since the end of September. Then I took a week off from all exercise before and after the race. Now I'm having a hard time getting going again. For the first time since I started running 1.5 years ago, I've contemplated quitting. I took so much time off that I feel like my base is gone, which is discouraging. My PT said that I could do "two miles" and I didn't bother to ask whether that was each time or once a week. Part of me feels like going out on a run to see the leaves turning colors as the season changes. Another part of me feels like curling up on my couch with a twinkie, soda ... and my books. I want the stress relief and the endorphins, but I'm frustrated with my leg aching and having to start over again.

I'm having a hard time explaining to my co-workers what I've been doing during the weekend after they talk about their social events. I usually spend most of my weekends with my nose in a book. At heart, I am a book nerd who thinks that the printed word can tell us everything about the world. Perhaps I should say that I spend a lot of time with my buddies (the Association Law Handbook and Professional Practices in Association Management, not to mention a few others) and I had some fast times (flipping note cards to review key terms and topics), then during a pensive moment, I did some writing (to take notes). I'm even thinking of this as trying on the life of an adult grad student.

And then there are my nefarious distractions. I've discovered that YouTube has all of my favorite '80s videos. I grew up with beginning of MTV, but this is better than that! I can watch my favorite video anytime, without waiting for it to come on, and I can play it five times in a row!! It's amusing to see another generation figure out the Kyrie Eleison means "Lord, have mercy" and it's spoken three times during the Catholic mass, as Richard Page does at the beginning of the song.

Baltimore 5K

I really wanted to be in Baltimore on Oct. 13 and I couldn't believe how excited my husband and I were about the race. I love the feel, the excitement, and the crowds in a big-city race. The weather was perfect. It was warmer than last year, about 47 degrees which was cool, but not cold.

We almost didn't make it. My logistics called for leaving the house at 7 a.m. for a half-hour drive into Baltimore with 15 minutes to park and walk to the starting line. This would give us 45 minutes before the start of the race to stretch, go to the bathroom, and watch the marathoners take off. But hubby decided to take a different road into Baltimore, and this cost us a stress-filled and argumentative 30+ minutes. The roads were closing and cars formed a single file line which snaked slowly into the stadium parking area which was filled to capacity. I honestly thought we'd never get to the starting line at all. But in the nick of time we found a parking spot and sprinted over to the starting line with just 10 minutes to spare. We swear we'll leave the house earlier next year and watch our stress management!

And we took off. Both of us found it easier this year now that we knew the course and what to expect. The Baltimore course is known for its hills, and the 5K race heads uphill for the first mile or so. I tried to think of it as a long incline, which I prefer to steep hills. I hit mile 1 at 12 minutes, as I did last year. Then the rest of the course went downhill, and I was able to speed up. I felt pretty good, considering that I hadn't run at all for several weeks since the injury and I took the last week off completely to rest a sore muscle on the side of my leg. As I was heading toward the finish line I got a right side stitch, so I tried to deal with it. The biggest hazard on the course was potholes and sewer covers and I nearly turned my ankle on one, but then a running angel caught my elbow and asked if I was OK. I replied that I was, but never said thank you. Thank you!

I came in at 31:40 -- a personal record for me!! It was a really great day and I was happy to be there and happy to be in the running.

My goal now is base, base, base!!!! I need a stronger base and a higher level of fitness to get to the next step.

Dreaming Big Dreams

It was a very experiential season that came, and went, and never really got off the ground. I didn't do many shorter races this year, preferring to focus on the half-marathon, and I deferred that because of the knee injury due to osteoarthritis, a byproduct of a car accident a decade ago. I was most surprised to learn that I didn't do anything wrong in my training that might have caused the injury. My biggest mistake may have been not taking enough time off to recuperate from the first injury before starting the HM plan. So much for self-castigation and flagellation! But I do believe now that there is value in keeping a training log and recording all injuries -- and developing a rating system that will note whether this was a small ache versus real pain. It's up to you to do your own research and analysis and present that information in the process of trying to determine what went wrong.

I tend to think that if I do all of the right things, everything will turn out right. I followed the training plan closely and tried to do everything to keep injury at bay. But sometimes things just happen for no reason. Or, maybe we don't understand the reason at the time.

So...as I take a break from running for a while to rest and recuperate, I'm trying to turn greater attention to other things. I find myself dreaming big dreams -- for next season. This comforts and inspires me. And I do want another season, and that is my motivation.

Week 11: Crash and Burn

I made an appointment with my sports doc after my knee hurt in the swimming pool, which was too freaky for me. Then I went on a great recovery weekend run and a Tuesday morning 60 min. run and felt fine. So, I canceled the appointment.

On Thursday, I got on the treadmill and my knee hurt, so I began to experiment with solutions. I tried a longer warmup. Wearing my knee strap, then taking it off. Finally, 40 minutes later, I gave up. And then I couldn't go up and down the stairs or get up from a sitting position without knee pain. I knew I was in trouble. I've been limping around ever since and walking up the stairs with one foot. I'm back on my sports doc's calendar in two weeks.

I don't know whether to cry or scream. I spent months preparing for the half-marathon and now I don't know if it's in my future. I can't help but feeling that I'm being smited. Every time I run 8 miles, I get injured. I can't understand what I did wrong and why this happened.

What I do know is that I'll be cross-training until I can see the doctor, and then I'll make a decision about the race and any future sports participation. But it's hard to keep it from my thoughts as I move from sadness to frustration to self-castigation and maybe finally to acceptance. The endorphins will come in handy! I am so glad that this is a busy time of year and that I have the CAE pursuit, family, and work to take my mind off of this.

Week 10: Keep on Going

Due to time constraints and declining daylight, I finally took my training indoors to the pre-dawn hours. Don't even ask me how early I'm working out. And looking at my basement insulation for an hour is really interesting. This is going to take a lot of discipline - and a second cup of coffee for the drive to work. It's also strange because in the afternoon while driving my kid to soccer or tutor, I look at the runners and cyclists going by and think about running. Then I realize that I already did my run.

The highlight of my week was going to the local aquatics center for a Friday morning swim workout. I figure I can come in a little later on Fridays because typically I put in more hours earlier in the week, and I always wind up staying later to wrap up the week. After a search of local indoor pools, I found a pool where the water is warm and the membership is cheap!!! There's an open lane, a nice hot tub, and a swim suit dryer. What more could I want?

Otherwise, things are going along. Work is so so. I fall asleep while reading. I got the answer wrong on this week's scenario question. My knees hurt in the swimming pool!!!?? I wake up with a sore throat. I feel like I lack discipline half the time. Just keep on going. And keep on going. Because then when an easy 6 mile run comes along on a perfect early fall day ... or my kid gets in a chatty mood and decides to tell me everything about his day ... I can enjoy it even more.

Week 9: Facing Fears

It's getting darker earlier and it's difficult get in a run unless I can out there around 6:30 p.m., which is challenging because I run on the days my kid has tutor. Even though I say I'm going to use the treadmill, I haven't done so yet. I hate the thought of spending so many months training on the treadmill...but I also hate running in the dark.

My knees began to ache after Thursday's run. I had a long run of 8 miles scheduled on Saturday and I was almost afraid to run. I seriously contemplated taking the day as a cycle or rest day. Then, I decided to jog a bit in front of my house, just to see how my legs felt. Convinced that they felt alright, I went to the park. I did the IronGirl route x2 running slow and taking a lot of walk breaks, especially in the first few miles around the first lap, just as the experts suggest. I even took some stretching breaks. Once I warmed up, I began to feel OK and my pace picked up. Toward the end, felt tired and my joints felt tired. I topped it all off with a cold water bath. We'll see how I feel tomorrow.

On Sunday, I went for a short bike ride because the outdoor pools closed, and I have no access to the pool for now. It was a really nice, perfect ride on a late-summer morning and the traffic was really light. My new bike shorts feel really comfy! But later, my joints and achilles tendon just felt sore, particularly after sitting down. It's as if my body starts to lock up when I sit down and don't move. It could be that my body just isn't used to the mileage. But when I feel like this, I start to seriously doubt whether I'll make it to the starting line.

This week I've been struggling with a particularly difficult domain on planning, evaluation and research, and I've been having a hard time putting all of the information together and wrapping my mind around it. Sometimes, the vocabulary seems to be used in different ways.

At the beginning of the online class, I made a graphic organizer using the Inspiration program that contains my affirmations, as suggested. Now, as the going gets tough, I'm learning the importance of affirmations.

Week 8: Slacking Off

This week called for:
50 minutes run-easy
40 minutes cycle
50 minutes run-form
4 mile long run
30 minutes swim

It's on of my last recovery weeks before the program peaks and I've been really taking it easy with everything. I ran super slow and cycled lazily. None of my runs were stupendous. During one run, I forgot my knee supporter and hoped that I wouldn't re-injure myself. During the other I couldn't seem to get going...and the day before the long run I ate sushi and for some reason it didn't sit right, which is anomaly for me, and I had stomach cramps for the entire morning.

The week ended with a mediocre 30-minute swim that I cut short when my knee felt funny. Then, I stubbed my pinky toe on something that my kid didn't pick up in his room and bruised my toe. Ouch.

The nicest part of the week was cycling. I decided to head down to my favorite park and cycle down the paved pathway. Definitely a must-do route. Later that week, I decided to return to that trail to enjoy the holiday. It was a fun ride and I had a nice endorphin high the rest of the day.

Being on a training program has its advantages and disadvantages as I tend to get a little obsessed with minutes and miles and doing everything according to plan. I'm getting a little nervous and wondering whether I can really make it through to race day as the program peaks. I just hope my body holds together. The half-marathon is on a very hilly course and just looking at the elevation map is making me nervous. Luckily, the 10 miler falls on the day of a supported course run, so if all goes well it will settle my nerves. I was concerned about the amount of time all of the training was taking, especially with everything else going on, but I realized it's not going to be too much more than what I'm doing now.

Week 7: Shifting Gears

So far, everything is going good with my workouts, and I don't feel so sore. But let's wait for the end of the week for the final judgement on that.

When I was cycling yesterday, I focused on sitting in the seat and shifting gears so that I wasn't pushing a high/hard gear going up hills or an incline or pedaling with no resistance on the downhills. I'm practicing the coordination needed to for gear shifting with both hands and I haven't quite got it down yet. This was one of those serendipitous discoveries that I made that my web search later showed was the right thing to do.

I'll be shifting gears in other ways. For my online class, we’re supposed to read anywhere from 75-178 pages a week and the instructor suggested that class participants to allow 6 hours a week for reading. Hahahahahah. I've never thought of myself as a slow reader, but it always takes me longer to read, process, and remember material. I am so very thankful now that I spent the summer reading, highlighting, and taking notes on most of these texts. If I had to read everything beginning now, I would drown. My focus will be on reviewing and remembering, rather than just trying to do a first read. I'm frustrated, though, because we did a practice test and I'm still had difficulty with many questions--even those that were more fact-based. And then there's the questions based on the reading and I can't recall where I read it. Yikes. It's not enough to read something and vaguely remember it because the test involves knowing details. One also has to know what is on a particular form--and what is NOT on that form.

The class is going to take a lot of time, and I think that as a compromise, beginning in September I'm going to move my running back to the treadmill in the predawn hours. It takes less time to go from my bed to the treadmill, and it frees up valuable time in the late afternoon and early evening.

Week 7 went out without event. I went for a 7 mile long run on Saturday, but ended up doing about 7.75 miles because I miscalculated the distance around the park when using the IronGirl route and making a complete circle. Lesson learned: it's actually closer to 8 miles and this knowledge will come in handy for my two 8 mile runs coming right up. All seems well on the running front.

IronGirl Triathlon

I wanted to learn more about triathlon, so at the last minute, I decided to volunteer for the IronGirl Triathlon. This was the most volunteer-friendly race I have ever participated in. Everyone was so nice, and willing to answer questions and explain things. I was amazed at both the oldest and the youngest athletes. I didn't expect to see people in their 70s doing a triathlon, nor did I expect to see 13-year-olds competing. My kids couldn't do that. It was interesting to see the whole event, what people were wearing, their equipment, and how they approached transition. Although it was a very long volunteer commitment, the entire event was very well run and a truly great experience.

Week 6: Yin and Yang

The week started out good with an easy 40 minute run with generous walk breaks. I swear, it doesn't make that much difference in time if I take walk breaks. My knee has been good, for the most part. I was working at home, so I took the opportunity to run at about 7 a.m. in the park. It always amazes me the number of people running in the park on a weekday, during rush hour when most people are commuting to work. There's some equipment sitting in the middle of the lake, but I never took much notice of it before. Today, I saw the equipment in action and realized that the algae is periodically removed from the lake.

This week, I did three workouts--run, bike, and run--on consecutive days. The whole thing is making me incredibly sore, and I'm a bit discouraged. I took Saturday off due to muscle soreness, skipped the swim workout, and then closed the week by running on Sunday (after volunteering at IronGirl). I'm also frustrated with wearing the knee band, which seems to help prevent knee soreness on longer runs. When people see me at the end of a workout with that band on, more than once I've been asked "Are you OK?" Yes, I'm OK!

I'm trying to figure out how to juggle all of the workouts so that I can complete everything without falling apart. I believe that the developers of the training plan envisioned that people were going to be doing a very leisurely bike ride or a very slow swim on their cross training days. Instead, I'm able to bring some conditioning to both sports and I'm an experienced swimmer, so I may be doing these workouts at a greater intensity and overdoing my crosstraining. Maybe juggling days will help and watching the overall intensity level of crosstraining will help. Maybe, just maybe, my body might adapt someday.

Phase I of my CAE prep came to a close. This weekend, I didn't do any real reading; instead, I'm reviewing my flash cards prior to my online class starting. I think I'll also go back and tackle the new edition of PPAM and take notes on the marketing book. Every time I turn around, I find a new book that's recommended reading, and now a book on core competencies in professional development is recommended reading before ASAE's course. I quickly ordered it and I'll tackle it when it arrives on my doorstep.

I think I finally comprehend the meaning of studying and running. To my understanding, it's like yin and yang -- the equal and opposing forces of mental and physical that when combined in proportion can complement and counterbalance each other to bring about an equilibrium to life.

Week 5: The Mist on the Water

Training has not been spectacular. I began the week with a stretch & strengthen session. A heat wave this week made it difficult to exercise. On Tuesday, I did a 40 min run at a conversational pace - I truly felt that I was running in slow motion, at the rate of a fast walk. Even with very generous walk breaks to avoid the hills near my home, I ran about 12 mins/mile. This should be my long run pace. My knee felt a bit sore at the end of the run and my thigh muscles felt a bit sore that night, probably because of the previous day's stretch and strengthen.

Cycling is easier in the heat because it creates a breeze and there's the feeling of propelling oneself through the air. I went out longer than I should have, but in the middle of the ride, I got one of my foot cramps in my left foot with waves of pain, so I stopped to walk it off in a nearby neighborhood. My legs were sore afterward, especially around the right knee.

Thursday, my knees felt sore after sitting for a long time at work, and I didn't like the way my knees were talking to me, so I took the day off of running and used the time to study. The lesson learned this week is to back off and not overtrain; otherwise, I'll never make it to race day.

Right now is the countdown before my distance learning class begins. It was suggested that we read three books--one about employment law, marketing, and financial statements--prior to starting the class, so I'm trying to get through these. Then, the plan is to go back and read and take notes on any chapters I missed in the other books. I also need to schedule a regular time to review the flash cards, perhaps during breakfast, tutor time, and the last hour before bed when I'm tired and falling asleep while reading.

Friday night I ran at one of my favorite haunts, and I like going back to the park periodically so I can see the ecosystem as it goes through seasonal changes. The one thing that I'm going right is that I'm running slowly at a conversational pace, taking generous walk breaks, and kinesthetically establishing a long run pace. This makes running very easy. Still, at the end of the run, my legs felt sore.

I wanted to keep my weekend schedule the same, so I got up an ran on Saturday morning. Once again, I ran slowly at a conversational pace and took walk breaks. Even so, my time is only a minute slower at 12 min/mile. At the end of this run, my right knee was sore. I hope I didn't overdo.

I went earlier trying to beat the heat, but it was a cool summer day that made me think of the coming fall season. The lake was like glass. Sunlight was shinning on the mist on the water. As time went on, the mist largely disappeared, but when I left, I could see traces of the mist that I've seen before. At first, I thought the mist was due to the different air/water temperatures, but now I think that maybe there's mist was on the lake every morning -- it's a reward for getting up early for a run.

Week 4: Twists and Turns

I'm busy navigating twists and turns on both the running front and the CAE front.

After I spent most of the spring reading and taking notes on two books that are key CAE literature, they came out with new editions! One book doesn't seem to have a great deal of change. But the other book, a collection of topics on association management, has several new chapters, different authors on familiar topics providing updated information as well as a slightly format that features questions at the end of each chapter. I'll be dealing with this in the fall as I go through my online class. Right now, I just want to read/skim all of the books before the class begins. I have several other entire books to read. This should keep me busy.

On the running front, week three flowed into week 4 because I realized that I'd wind up a week short on the training program. Rule number one: Always begin your training program by writing down the weeks and calendar dates. I'd been too lazy to do this before now. But it wasn't a big problem because week 4 was the same as the preceeding week, except that the long run was 5 miles instead of 4 miles.

On Saturday, I tried to get to the park as early as possible in order to beat the heat. Everybody was there! It was like a big fitness party, which provided plenty of opportunity for great people watching. Member of the local running club were running around and a lot of cyclists gathered in groups for a ride. As I left, people were parked on the grass and some cars had kayacks on the roof.

The run went well and I was huffing and puffing along. In my zeal to try to get back into shape, I ran a very consistent 11 min/mile pace, which was good but way too fast. This is my race pace. My long run pace should be a conversational pace of 12:30-13 mins/mile. I'll have to focus on my mantra of "no need for speed" even if everyone seems to be blazing by while I'm waddling along. I also used my fuel belt, which seemed to work well. My knee was fine during the run, but when I got home after the run and began doing household chores, my right knee felt stiff and I had trouble bending it while walking down the stairs. I iced it and the stiffness resolved, but this is worrisome. I also ordred a knee support which I'm going to be experimenting with.

In looking at the IronGirl Triathlon course map, which will be held in the same park in two weeks, I realized that I could extend my route around the lake from 2.4 miles to 3.4 miles by going down a different trail that winds around a baseball diamond. I'll have to try that. The map also helped me discover the route that all the cyclists may be using.

I closed out the week with a 40 min. swim, once again trying to use the low-impact sport to re-build my aerobic fitness. I swam at a moderate/fast pace for about 25 mins., using the rest of the time to warm up or cool down.

Weeks 2-3: A Snake in the Path

Week 2 of the half-marathon training program was spent at Myrtle Beach. The entire vacation was superlative in every way. The weather was 86 degrees and sunny every day. The beach was the best that I've ever been at. The water was warm, like a bathtub, and the waves were not too intense, until the late afternoon. The beach is extremely well lifeguarded, so I felt very safe. The hotel had a tiki bar with live music every afternoon, which could be heard on the beach and in the pools. We spent 3 days on the beach, and by then we were sunburned and friend. Then we decided to take a day away from the beach to visit Alligator Adventure and Boardwalk on the Beach, which had 100 shops and a the feel of a Disney theme park with its theme decor. My youngest son went off to a wizard adventure with his dad, while I shopped with my older son. Later, we all went to Ripley's Aquarium. You wouldn't think that Ripley had an aquarium, but it was excellent. The highlight of the aquarium was the "Dangerour Reef." To design the reef, most of the building was a giant fish tank with a glass tunnel at the bottom so that visitors could look up and see the sharks teeth as they swam over the tunnel. Every tank was clean and spotless and all of the fish, with the exeption of one or two, looked extremely healthy. We spent one more day on the beach, and then topped it off with a visit to a local water park, which was nice, but not all that great in comparison to some of the water parks that we've been to. The only downside was the drive, which was purported to be about 8 hours on TripTiks, but actually stretched to 11-12 hours with traffic jams, bathroom breaks, and food stops.

I'm still struggling to come back from injury and run in the humid heat. My training plan this week called for two 30 minute runs and a long run of 2 miles, which was accomplish by running and walking. At the hotel, I also took advantage of the workout room to cross train with the elliptical maching, exercise bike, and weights.

Week 3

My week calls for two 30 minute runs, one with 4 quick strides, and a long run of 4 miles. Two days will be spent cross training, and if I'm really good, I'll stretch and strengthen. A highlight of the week so far is that I took the longest bike ride ever for cross training--40 minutes. So far, no soreness or injury. Bike riding in the head is actually easier because there's the wind and the feeling of movement. But then, my bike tire went flat. I'll have to remember to get that fixed.

Today is the first run, and it's a steamy hot 93 degree day and I feel like wilting. I feel lazy like the alligator in the picture and I can't get motivated to run at all. I ran with generous walk breaks and I feel so discouraged and out of shape. All winter I'm running and trying to warm up and I can't wait for summer, but now I'm wishing for cooler weather.

But today was a rare back to nature exprience. As I was about to set out on my favorite trail, I saw a snake in the path. I walked up to it, wondering if it was poisonous or even alive, but then tought better than to cross it's path and I decided to head down another path, thinking that I could see any snakes more easily by running on a paved pathway. As I turned around, I could see it slither across the path. It was alive after all. As I ran down the alternate path, I saw a mother deer and a baby cross the path. I stopped at a distance and let them cross. On the way back, I saw a possum or beaver or otter-like animal. I also ran by a grazing deer. They must not be afraid of humans.

I've got to get back to studying! My husband has a terrible cold, and I hope I don't get another!!

Half-Marathon Plan, Week 1

I am so utterly discouraged. I signed up for a marathon/half-marathon program offered by my local running club. I was really looking forward to this. But now I'm wondering what I got myself into. I'm trying to recover from a knee injury and I've been fighting a cold this week after traveling.

The program kicked off on a hot day and with a dew point of 50%. I thought they'd probably have water because it was offered during other club programs, but they expected everyone to bring their own and of course I forgot to bring water. Then they had everyone run 4 miles--without any stretching. Perhaps they figured that everyone stretched beforehand or this was somehow unnecessary. It was the absolute worst 4 miles I have ever run in my life. I finished dead last.

I felt like my son. He's training for the football team and absolutely hates running because it's boring and he think's he'll loose weight (haha). The first time he did sprints he threw up. The second time, he laid down at the end. He said it was the hardest thing he ever did and he felt like he was in the military. I wanted to lay down during this run or just quit.

At the conclusion of the session, they handed me a half-marathon program that included a lot more miles and a lot longer runs sooner in the program than I was thinking of doing. After my knee injury, I've revised my goals downward and I'm planning to follow the "Run Half Marathon" program in John Bingham's book "Marathoning for Mortals." This program starts out conservatively and ramps up slowly. I pray that I don't re-injure my knee after that run.

I thought this was a program for beginners, but it turns out that everyone has been running for several years and many participants have run several marathons and are looking to improve their time. Prior to signing up, I even e-mailed and asked if this was appropriate, and was encouraged to register for the program. Now I'm wondering why they don't have a program specifically geared to first timers.

I feel so utterly discouraged and demoralized. Now, I am thinking about quitting.

Pittsburgh Triathlon
This experience comes on the heels of a really nice run. I traveled to Pittsburgh for a conference and the hotel had a a route developed by Runner's World. I was naturally hesitant to run early in the morning on an unfamiliar route in an urban area, but a co-worker did it and thought it was safe.

On the last day of the conference I headed out at 6 a.m. and ran along the banks of the Allegheny River. As I was running along, I saw two people with wetsuits get out of the river. I thought they were triathletes enjoying an Sunday morning open water swim. I was right! And that wasn't all. Soon, I came upon the transition area of the Pittsburgh Triathlon. I stopped to ask the volunteer questions, and we chatted about the temperature of the water as he patiently answered my newbie questions. It was the highlight of my day. I recently stumbled upon Meagan Timney's blog, "I Tri Therefore I Am," and if I didn't know better, I'd think it was a sign.

After all that, I ran back to the hotel quickly, and best of all, my knee was fine and I felt like I was back in the running.

A Perfect Downfall

I'm a perfectionist by nature. I want to be perfect in everything I do, and so I tend to overdo things. And true to form, I approach running the same way. I ran and increased my mileage...and then I overdid it. When I look back, I did everything wrong: I ran too many hills and ran on too many banked roads, increased mileage too fast and too soon, and ran too many days of the week with no cross-training or strength training.

Now I'm injured. My right knee aches and so does my achilles tendon. Of course it's always the right leg. At first I tried to crosstrain by swimming, but that seemed to aggravate the injury rather than help it. My bicycle seems to be calling out to me from the garage for cross training, but that never worked out well before because it only aggravated my achilles, so I'm wondering why I have this particular urge. Over the years, I've learned to pay attention to my urges because they lead to some nice things. So, I got a new bike seat that's softer and may be more easy to adapt to.

So, I've retreated to my couch and computer, surfing the net and trying to find the cure, wondering when this is going to go away. I feel so stupid. And restless. And worried. I'm planning to take two weeks off. Then I want to get on my half-marathon training plan and I'm fervently hoping that I can get through this without injury. I blame it on the stupidity for running that last long run...but I'm hoping I'll reach that distance once again, and this time I'll be able to run strong. I hope that I'll be able to learn how to train sensibly.

The good news is that while my running is languishing, my CAE studying is pickiing up!

Running Through Summer

Now summer's here and the weather is really beginning to get hot. I added another run to my mid-week repetoire so that I'm running about 3 miles x 3 days a week. However, I can seldom have a "perfect week." Sometimes life just gets in the way of running and I wind up skipping a workout. If I do workout, then one run is usually very easy, with many walk breaks. I'm also back to increasing my long runs on the weekend. Last week I did 7 miles, and this week I did 8 miles--a record for me!!!!! My running schedule happened to coincide with my church's Run/Walk for Tanzania, which gave me some friendly people to run with at the park where I typically run. It was a real treat to run with other people. I went 4 laps around the lake. There are two duck families and it's been fun to watch the baby ducks grow up week by week as I jog around the park. It takes me about 1.5 hours to run 7-8 miles, and my husband got me a fuel belt, which I'm sure will come in handy.

I've been wanting to get back to my CAE studying and really put some serious time into this effort. But life keeps happeing. There's a board committee project that was more time-consuming than anticipated. The need to prep for an IEP meeting. My advocate quitting. Getting behind at work. A difficult author. Traveling for the holidays. Kids sports and tutor. It seem like I have less and less time for everything. I used to take classes at my local community college in preparation for a master's degree. Now, I can't figure out how I did it all. Maybe it was because I slept less. I remember during one summer class, I was more tired and fell asleep at every boring meeting and at church on Sunday. Maybe it was sheer determination. Where did the time and motivation go? The only fortuitious thing was that I planned out a study guide that called for spending 3 weeks on each area of focus. After all the distraction, I'm still on schedule. I haven't taken notes on all the chapters, as I wanted, but perhaps I can read everything once over before fall. Maybe I can put the piece into place again as I run through summer and the warm weeks fly by.

Sring is Here

Ran 4 miles today around Lake Elkhorn. Spring has finally come to Maryland and the ducks have fuzzy green babies. One duck family has three and another duck family has six babies. There's also an area of the lake near the bridge that is home to a lot of turtles!

I ran the first lap around the park very slowly with my husband. He always says he's going to take up running, but only does it on the weekend and wonders why he's not in shape.

I haven't been running a lot lately, prior to the Future Leaders conference this weekend. Everybody around me was sick: my kid was sick, my co-worker was sick, and my boss was sick. I just wanted to rest up before the conference and not get sick, as traveling when you're sick is misery. Hopefully, I'll be able to get back on schedule and buildup again...

Clyde's 10K

I almost didn't run this race. The temperatures were in the low 40s and it was pouring rain the whole time. I hate rain. It's one of my least favorite weather conditions, and I've never even run in the rain before. I did all my pre-race preparations and then decided to go and sit in my car in the parking lot, and then make a decision about heading to the starting line. I decided to wear my capris shortly before leaving the house, as I didn't want to look unseasonal. But I decided to bring along my tights, just in case. As I sat in the car I could see many runners in tights, and I make a last-minute decision to put on my tights in the car. Nobody saw that, right?! It was the best decision I made. The tights saved the day! They kept my leg muscles warm and I didn't even feel the rain. I love my tights.

But the rain came pouring down. And when it did, I just closed my eyes and turned inward. After a desultory start, I actually began to wake up as the race went on. Three miles went by easily. I paced myself by a woman and her daughters that were running together, but there were two hills in the race, which were actually long inclines, and I lost speed as my pacers gained ground. After mile five, I couldn't believe that the race was coming to an end, and I tried to pick up the pace as I got to the finish line. I caught up to my pacers and tried to pass, but then my CI fell off and I had to stop and mess with it. I'll have to get an earmold made so this doesn't happen again. I came in strong for a finish in 1:08:26.30, which was OK. But most of all, I made it through the 10K easily and I discovered that I like this distance.

It wasn't until afterward that I really felt the effects of the rain and the cold as I began shivering. I never realized that my husband had been at the finish line cheering me on until he caught up with me at the restaurant that sponsored the race. It was really sweet of him to come out to see me on such a miserable day.

I finally jump-started my CAE studying by approaching it like a training plan for the half-marathon. Using the state association study guide as a template, I made up a plan for the next 21 weeks, outlining the number of weeks I'd spend on each of 10 domains. I'm gaining ground on each of two goals.

Christmas in April

Global warming is here. We had snow in April!!!! The grass is green, the daffodils are blooming, the trees are budding...and the temperature dropped into the 20s overnight and it snowed! I went out for my Saturday morning long run, and by the time I finished, it melted. I ran in Centennial park, which is becoming one of my favorite places to run because it has a longer 2.4 mile path that circles the park. There are a lot of red winged black birds and red birds that may be summer tanagers. All of the birds, ducks, and rabbits are very tame.

I Need a Muse

I titled my blog "My Muse" because I so often need a muse, which is defined by the Merriam-Webster dictionary as "a source of inspriation...a guiding genius...and any of the nine sister goddesses in Greek mythology presiding over song and poetry and arts and sciences."

I just feel stressed these days. There's only 24 hours in a weekend, and never enough time to get everything done. I need a muse to help me write. I need a muse to help me tackle the incredible amount of busywork and paperwork that life involves.

I'm finding it difficul to make the transition from the treadmill in the morning to running outdoors in the afternoon when my kid is at sports or tutor because so many things can happen that will take away the time I planned to run. While I really enjoyed increasing my long runs, I felt like a "weekend warrier" because I was sore for a day or two afterward. On the treadmill, I tend to walk-run, but outdoors, I tend to want to run most of the way, so that's an increase in intensity. My new goal is to add an additional mid-week workouit and slowly build up my mid-week mileage to 9-10 miles over time. Later, I'll put it all together and then once again increasing my long runs.

I'm in a slump with my CAE studying ever since I finished the online course early and then promptly burned out. I need to set up a plan for steady reading and studying, similar to the way I've done for my running buildup. I feel like I don't want this bad enough to study consistently.

I need a muse to give me inspiration in life.

The Birds Outside the Window

I wasn't going to post about my cochlear implant, but it's part of my experience. I've had the CI for four years now, which makes me an "old timer," but even so, I still have some CI moments. Here are some I'd like to share....

Sometimes at work I hear new sounds, either because of processor reprogramming or serendipity. At work, my cube is several feet from a window, and this spring I've begun to hear the birds outside, which I don't remember hearing before in the nine years I've work for this organization. I couldn't believe I was hearing the soft, high-pitched sound of birdcall from inside the building.

I like to ask co-workers about new sounds that I'm hearing, but I've learned to be careful because sometimes they think I'm crazy. After all, how would you feel if a fourtysomething person came up to you and asked about the sound of birds, which you've taken for granted your whole life? People don't realize that having a CI is an ongoing experience that brings new discoveries, even four years later. But this time I picked a safe person to ask, and she responded to my questions with an e-mail describing when and why one might hear birds.

The same thing happened at my home. I heard a low-pitched noise while sitting at the kitchen table that I hadn't noticed before and turned to ask my kid. It turns out that the ice maker periodically makes ice.

Even though I rarely talk about the cochlear implant with others anymore, it's something I always enjoy -- and never take for granted. No matter how difficult the listening situation, I'm always able to keep my spirits up and see it positively because I know how poorly I would have performed in that same situation without the implant. And there isn't ever a time when I come out of a movie theater that I'm not grateful to have this.

No Need for Speed

At right is a view of a recent winter snow from my backyard. Snow is rather rare in Maryland so I wanted to take pictures, and this time it melted the next day.

I was doing a recovery run last weekend around Lake Elkhorn and I had a variety of aches and pains that don't usually happen. I sensed that I was running too fast, especially for a shorter recovery run. When I got home, I realized that I had just run at my 5K race pace! When I ran the numbers in the Runner's World training calculator, it showed that based on my typical 5K race pace of 34 mins., my long runs should be at 13 min/mile. It will take me about 1:11 to finish that upcoming 10K and I'll finish the half-marathon in 2:36.

My running mantra is going to be the title of John Bingham's column and book, "No Need for Speed." This week I ran 6.5 miles without any walk breaks. I purposely tried to run slow, as if I were going in slow motion. The third lap around the lake was still a bit difficult and at the end my hips ached a bit, but whenever the going got tough, I reminded myself that there's no need for speed and tried to slow down and keep going at an easy pace. Even so, I'm still going faster than the recommended 13 mins.

This weekend spring was in the air and the temperature got up to 60 degrees! I broke out my tights and jacket. It was a beautiful day and a lot of people took a break from Saturday chores to enjoy the nice weather. A woman from church came up to me and asked me if I'd been running at Lake Elkhorn and said that she was there and didn't recognize me. No matter, I told her. One of my biggest joys in my life with a cochlear implant is hearing people say "hi" to me as I run by. I think of all the times when I didn't have the cochlear implant or wore a hearing aid and didn't hear anybody saying anything--how rude it must have seemed when I didn't say "hi" back to them.

A big "hi" and "good morning" to everyone that passes me in the park! You make my day!!

Baby it's cold outside!

Today I ran three laps around Lake Elkhorn!!!! That's another goal met: 6 miles in 1.06. I felt like I hit my stride and went slowly, but surely. Usually I take several walk breaks around the first lap, but today I took very few walk breaks around any lap, although I did walk up the hills. The third lap around was the hardest because it was really tiring. I had very few aches and pains and as I write this in the evening, I can say that my thighs feel a bit sore, but so far so good.

I'm also thinking about slowing down down my mileage increases to give my body more time to adjust to the longer distances and stay injury free. This is important to me because I was in a car accident about 9 years ago and had a minor injury to my right kneecap, and even now when it's cold or damp out, I can sometimes still feel that knee. Previously, I've had some problems with my right achilles tendon, and now it seems that in the cold I can feel it the cold weather or after a workout. I can't help thinking that my right leg is the weaker one--I have few problems with the left leg. So I really want to be careful and gradual in building my base. In every three-week cycle, I plan to repeat the previous longest distance, then increase by 10%, and then decrease by 50% during a recovery week. Then I'll start the cycle again with the new longest distance.

It's been really cold here in Maryland and this is the first year in a long time that snow has been on the ground for more than a day or two. It was 25-30 degrees during my run. It didn't seem quite so cold and there wasn't a lot of wind chill. The lake is frozen now, except for a small section near the dock where the birds congregate. I always feel so sorry for the birds being outside in the water in this cold weather. I always wonder why they don't go further south for the winter. The cold makes it sooooo hard to get motivated to get out there and run. I just feel like hibernating. I feel tired a lot and I can't get up in the morning. At night, I just want to dive right into my warm bed.

I'm fighting the urge to knit in this cold weather and finish up a scarf or two. But I'm in the middle of an online class that I'm taking as part of my CAE pursuit and I'm knee-deep in reading chapters and articles, and then posting online and participating in web chats. It suits me perfectly--I really like going to school.

Knitting for Christmas

I always wanted to post pictures of my knitting projects because I really enjoy seeing other people's pictures on their blogs.

This is the Christmas I knitted gifts for everyone. I made my mom a simple garter stitch triangular shawl in a sparkly kid mohair that she can wear to Red Hat Ladies events. My coworkers, who are far more experienced knitters than I, were just raving about it. I knit my tutor a small keyhole scarf out of some super soft hand-dyed angora wool that produced variegated colors. I often knit at her house during the two hours a week she patiently helps my kid with his reading. Her house is a knitter's paradise, well decorated, always clean, and very peacefull with light coming in from the skylight. My co-workers received a version of this same scarf design knitted with fuzzy angora wool.

On these cold winter days I still enjoy my very first knitting project: a garter stitch scarf made out of a super-chunky multi-colored wool. The scarf is now longer than I am tall, so I can wrap it around and around and around my neck for warmth. It was knit on size 35 needles, so it was really quick and easy. I knit one for my husband and one son, and I'm tempted to knit up another for myself.

But all of my knitting projects will have to wait. I've put away my knitting needles and unfinished projects for the year so I can focus on studying for the CAE.

One Hour Runner

On Saturday, Jan. 21, 2007--almost exactly a year after I started running--I became a 1-hour runner!! I can't quite believe it. Before I do each long run in the back of my mind I think, "I can't run 1 hour..." and then somehow I just do it. This is a little over 5 miles for me, nearly three laps around my favorite park. I don't run all of the way. I run the first lap with intermittent walk breaks, then run the entire second lap, and then go back to running with walk breaks. If I don't do anything else with my running, I hope to continue to be a 1-hour runner.

I've been following a schedule to become a 1-hour runner that I found in Runner's World that calls for increasing the long run by 10% two consecutive weeks and cutting back by 50% the third week as a rest week. (The plan suggested that experienced runners could increase by 20%-25%, but I thought that was just too much.) So far this has worked out well, but I find that running 55+ mins is hard on my body and I'm tired or a bit sore the next day. So, I plan to repeat weeks to let my body adjust. This next week I'm going to a conference, and next week I'm running a 5K race. After that I'll go back to running 60 minutes.

During the week I run on the treadmill at about 4 a.m.!!! I swear, sometimes the only reason I'm running at that hour is because the treadmill is moving. I'm up to 45 minutes now. Usually, I begin by walking 15 minutes and then alternate running and walking by some ratio.